It's Christmas time and your not home .....so tonight I pray that God will come and hold you in His arms and tell you from my heart , I wish you Merry Christmas.
Dreaming of the day when I can finally call you mine.......
Believing this will be our last Christmas without you in our arms Addi May
Last weekend was Orphan Sunday. Significant to some, maybe most didn't even know. For our family it was the beginning of this journey we are on ...... Orphan Sunday November, 2009 to be exact . Lloyd and I watched a live simalcast hosted by ShowHope. This is when the seed God had planted in our hearts many years before began to sprout. The rest of the timeline goes like this: January 2010- A discussion over dinner at confirms we both are "100%" sure about this thing called "adoption", something at the time we really knew nothing about April 2010 - "let's start", I research, I request packets, we explore options We found the agency we felt had the most reputable presence in the adoption community. We looked at countries that met our "hopes" for our daughter.....then it happened Bulgaria ....estimated 10,000 orphans Ukraine....estimated 100,000 orphans but Ethiopia........ 4.3 MILLION. That was all it took for God to open our eyes to something so much bigger than our desire for a daughter. May 2010- We began the application process to adopt our daughter from Ethiopia July 2010- We will call her "Addi May" Sept 2010 - We are officially accepted into the Ethiopia program with All God's Children Dec 31,2010 - our dossier is received Jan 17,2011 We are number #97 for a girl 0-2 So the wait begins, Here is a little taste of the process: May 2011-#70 Nov 2011-#48 March 2012-#35 May 2012-#34 August 2012-#21 October 2012-# 19
This process is nothing like anything else. It's like I've been pregnant now for 22 months. It's difficult to create a balance of preparation and anticipation for something so life changing, and yet continue to live and enjoy the day we are in at this very moment. I seriously feel like I've loved her for a thousand years
Because sometimes in the waiting for what we long for, we praise God long when the gift comes at long last. Sometimes God has his people wait long, so our gratitude becomes deeper and wider.” – Ann Voskamp, The Jesse Tree Journey Blessings~Kelli
What is your number? I question I hear on a regular basis and if in truth someone asked me for my number( meaning my phone number) I would most likely assume (like a fellow adoptive mom) they would mean our waitlist number.
Our waitlist number kinda sets the time frame for the process of this adoption.
On January 19, 2010 we were placed on the waitlist with our agency for #97 for a girl 0-2.
As of this day October 15, 2012 we are #19. Finally in the teens!
What has occured to me is that if you are not an official stalker of the waitlist, you may not understand exactly how it works. Basically there are 19 families in front of us. However, these families may be on a sibling list or boys list as well. So a boy referral may in fact result in movement on the girls list depending on the families parameters.
Something that I have often explained in an effort to communicate the waitlist process is that once we are at #1 we will receive a referral.
I no longer think that is how its going to go down.
To put in perspective, last week the family that received their referral was #10 on the waitlist for a girl 0-2.
I think its time we start anticipating a "call".
As we wait we are trusting God and His perfect timing for a "call" about a little girl across the world, that we pray will take us as her family.
.....besides the fact they have completely consumed the Belt home January and February 2012
Today I awakened to a yucky sad feeling. Nothing unusual and something I have experienced most mornings since January 4th. But today was for a different reason. We lost. The Falcon boys basketball lost their chance to win the Gold Ball. What in the world !- how can this possibly compare to the loss of my mother. How could the two even remotely be viewed as similar. So I wrestled most of the morning with this wretched desire to throw in the towel and chalk all of life up as a loss ( a little dramatic I'm sure).
Then God began to show me something ....... As I cleaned the kitchen I finished listening to a sermon entitled "Pivotal Circumstances" by Andy Stanley which I recommend you go here Five Things to Grow your Faith and download for $1. I had listened to half of it on the way to the basketball game last night.
So what does losing one of the most important people in my life have to do
With Basketball?
I have watched my husband pour his life into these boys......practicing with them every Sunday night for 3 years . Talking about them non-stop. With a dream of them getting the ultimate reward of the gold ball and winning the state Championship. They were supposed to win....they were the best in the State of Oklahoma....
My husband has watched me pour my life into my mom for 4 years. With a dream her health would be restored. She wasn't supposed to die. Her cancer was stable......
Dreams over , gone. What we hoped for are not even possible anymore. God did not show up and answer our prayers.... But this is where He showed me something very profound .
When my mom past away we buried her with one of these bracelets. One of our adoption bracelets that say "praying for Addi May". A gesture of including our daughter who will never know my mom .
When the state tournament started I saw my husband wearing one of these for the first time. I thought that was really special how he must have wanted her to be a part of this "win" since she is not with us yet. But he didn't win.
And this is where I realize this bracelet represents so much more to us. It represents our belief and hope. We have fallen in love with an Ethiopian baby we have never even seen. This bracelet represents our hope for Him to redeem a life story of a baby girl on the other side of the world and not leave her as an orphan.
Even in our hurt and loss we trust Him anyway. Our belief is in a God who is bigger than this sin ravished world that takes our dreams. This bracelet represents, more importantly, our believe in our own redemption through our adoption as sons and daughters of a Living God.
I want to see Him even in our losses. Disappointment and gut wrenching hurt is sure to come, maybe through death. Maybe in a basketball game. I want to say "I believe" even when my circumstances try to convince me I have nothing to hang my belief on.
Today I am going to put on my bracelet , enjoy the sunshine and do some singing along with Crowder
